Torture me

The mark on my head makes you ran away.
The scar on my blue heart makes you forsake me.
Though you feel it,  you continue to walk away.
Though you see me suffer,  you turn your back.
You are all I want and at the same time all I can never have.
If I could swim to get to you,  I wouldn't because you'd still deny me.
I'd write a million love songs but without your replies,  they'd be meaningless echoes.
I'd catch a grenade for you but you'd watch me die.
I am nothing to you and nothing pains me more than this.
All I could do is be thankful you are closeby. Though not by my side,  somewhere near my shadow,  though you'll never love me like I want you to.
I could make due with your pretty smile,  your lovely voice and your presence near me for the little time I have.
For this is my end,  an adjournment to my journey.
It certainly isn't my last,
But it's among my best.
I will not run away,
My presence in the shadows will errode anything we ever had.
My curse will carry on,
Torture me with another dangle I'll never get to.
My tears will dry up,  I'll be a distant memory,  an extinct species in your evolution.
But on my death bed I'll remember you,  remember your laughter,  your touch,  your face, among with the many others my hermatia has brought me across.
I'll shed a tear and give up, life's a bitch anyhow.
I'll never get what I want!!
Kk
3/03/2015

Human

Let's talk about being human.
Being cursed.
Was it the apple that Adam ate?
Was it of our own bringing?
We struggle so hard to overcome our true selves
Evade our inner nature,
So we spend decades building careers,  religions, virtues, morals.
All in vain I say.
For what reason do we need these things..  to bring in more vanity?
Science, riches,  power, money..
All vanity,  yet its what we seek with all our hearts.
Driven by jealousy,  hate,  greed and lust.
This is the true human nature.
Given the gift of intelligence and all the curses that come with it,
The universe does not smile upon us.  It mourns for us,  we don't need the devil to ruin us we are already ruined by birth.
Yet as much as we try to fight back we cannot,
Most of us retreat.  Live our lives in the shadows fulfilling our lusts and absurd virtues,  we wait for death,  to free us of this suffering,
Yet we mourn the dead,  we become sad that the deceased will no longer fill our voids that demand filling with the lusts of the world,  that he/she cannot feed our in born greed.
If this was brought by our original parents for eating the fruit.
Then it's too harsh a punishment,  I'd rather be wiped off the earth than continue in this cocoon built by lies upon lies upon lies that our forefathers built to hide their sins.  To be rid of their shame,
Yet unwillingly we are forced to continue its construction so that our sons and daughters can carry the family traditions..
Poor is the man who cannot see this for himself,  even if he owned all the gold in the world,  he'd be as blind as a bat..
And dead is the man who sees this filth but denies it in his heart,
For denying this is an insult to God.. 
So as you continue to fufill your grotesque needs,  quench that undying thirst,  for there's nothing left to do.  Know you are the filth of the earth,  the universe spits on you..  man cannot colonize the universe.  It wil crush him. For what is he to the world but a fat rat who breeds in the masters kitchen? Soon he might be exterminated.  But the world is every thing to man.
So as you see death and despair,  do not shed a tear, for it is of your own making . You should be happy to see the tree your forefathers planted is finally bearing fruit and you are next in line vermin!!!

Kk

I have every right

Sometimes I think.
I Maybe too cocky,
I judge too much,
Who made me god?
I see all your flaws but none of mine,
I just can't hide under the notion
Am human?
Aren't we all?
I like it when am thrown down,
When am trumplled on,
When am deserted, 
Because then I feel the way you feel,
I like the judgment, 
I like being the victim,
I love looking odd,
Not fitting in,
Being the black sheep,
Maybe am sadistic,
I love being sad,
Because then I know am just like you,
Am not special,
I have a heart, 
And so I deserve to judge.

Kk

Our sons

Never underestimate the sun.
Without it we wouldn't exist.
We wouldn't have culture,
No technology, no diversity. No us
But the sun is not intelligent.
It is not diverse,
It has no culture,
But it is faaar more important than we will ever be.
But I wish I could destroy it,
And by extension destroy us.
Because we do not deserve it's life!!

Kk

Fitting in

Fitting in,
Its a process, its a struggle,  but its human. We spend most of our lives trying to fit in.
This implies that there exist a pre created group or "class " we are trying to fit in.. but the sad one is we know very little about the group of people we want to be like.  Studying to become the financial elite,  to get your family out of the gutter.  Hustling to own a car,  drive your kids to school,  trying hard to get a hot wife to get into the hot wife club. But life is alot more than these fancy titles,  more than all these material gains.  And what is it to you to gain the whole world and loose your soul?  I partly blame capitalism,  brainwashing kids,  and these kids brainwashing other kids,  ensuring there is a never ending chain,  trying to fit in for nearly 30 years of your life,  for each second of it trying to match your perfect dream.  Or so we think,  dreams are the ones we had as kids not illusions brought from capitalistic over lords,  but talk of dreams is one for another day. But once your better days are gone you realize it was a hoax,  the good beginning to a nightmare.  But it's too late,  your in too far,  or you think my analogy is a mad man's craze.

But I wonder why we cannot see this from the beginning, yet the signs are so clear?  Are we blind?  Am I the only one who sees?  I bet I may live my whole lifetime and never see another man who understands. We were not ment for social cages,  we were not ment to be capitalistic zoos.  We dominate the earth and should not let other people's ideas dominate others because in the human interlect kingdom inter-species dominance is non existant

Kk

the day we made the sun cry

The day we shot the sun in the eye,
The day we saw him cry, 
We didn't feel the heat,
Just the courage that filled our hearts,
We made the sun cry,  his tears will save us now,
We were overjoyed.
His tears would end our existence, 
And this was our greatest desire!

Kk

Dont tell me if am dying

Sometimes I think too much..
I think mostly about me
Call me selfish.  I wouldn't care
Never whats around me.
Rarely about science and stuff.

Mostly about life.
I over grew my concience..
I think too much,
I care too much..
Am overhuman.
But sometimes I think am alone.
Every one else a simulation.
Does every one think the same?
Or it's just me?
For sure I can't ask..
I'll ask God,,  but he won't answer..
My curiosity will run rife..
I'll forever be unsettled.
An equation without a solution.
A sentence without a full stop.
In the movie of my life,
There is no end,  its a continuous uphill battle..
But its never the end..  never will be the end. 
Its sepriternal,,  only a start no end..
If I could only find a mirror.
My start would be my end. 
If my questions are never answered.  . I'll never settle